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Connie Loizos

Hedge Fund Manager Andrew Lahde Hates Hedge Fund Industry, Quitting Immediately

Posted on: October 17th, 2008

I remember thinking that the tech bubble had truly burst the day I learned that the Industry Standard magazine had folded. (It was last in a long line of technology business mags to kick the bucket, the punctuation at the end of an era.)

A letter just sent out by hedge fund manager Andrew Lahde — who was widely celebrated earlier this year for the 866 percent return his then one-year-old fund enjoyed in 2007 – communicates the same feeling. The party is over.

His “goodbye,” in which Lahde says the hedge fund industry is broken right now, and that that’s fine with him because he hates it and doesn’t want his life to suck, follows: 

October 17, 2008
Today I write not to gloat. Given the pain that nearly everyone is experiencing, that would be entirely inappropriate. Nor am I writing to make further predictions, as most of my forecasts in previous letters have unfolded or are in the process of unfolding. Instead, I am writing to say goodbye.

Recently, on the front page of Section C of the Wall Street Journal, a hedge fund manager who was also closing up shop (a $300 million fund), was quoted as saying, “What I have learned about the hedge fund business is that I hate it.” I could not agree more with that statement. I was in this game for the money. The low hanging fruit, i.e. idiots whose parents paid for prep school, Yale, and then the Harvard MBA, was there for the taking. These people who were (often) truly not worthy of the education they received (or supposedly received) rose to the top of companies such as AIG, Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers and all levels of our government. All of this behavior supporting the Aristocracy, only ended up making it easier for me to find people stupid enough to take the other side of my trades. God bless America.

There are far too many people for me to sincerely thank for my success. However, I do not want to sound like a Hollywood actor accepting an award. The money was reward enough. Furthermore, the endless list those deserving thanks know who they are.

I will no longer manage money for other people or institutions. I have enough of my own wealth to manage. Some people, who think they have arrived at a reasonable estimate of my net worth, might be surprised that I would call it quits with such a small war chest. That is fine; I am content with my rewards. Moreover, I will let others try to amass nine, ten or eleven figure net worths. Meanwhile, their lives suck. Appointments back to back, booked solid for the next three months, they look forward to their two week vacation in January during which they will likely be glued to their Blackberries or other such devices. What is the point? They will all be forgotten in fifty years anyway. Steve Balmer, Steven Cohen, and Larry Ellison will all be forgotten. I do not understand the legacy thing. Nearly everyone will be forgotten. Give up on leaving your mark. Throw the Blackberry away and enjoy life.

So this is it. With all due respect, I am dropping out. Please do not expect any type of reply to emails or voicemails within normal time frames or at all. Andy Springer and his company will be handling the dissolution of the fund. And don’t worry about my employees, they were always employed by Mr. Springer’s company and only one (who has been well-rewarded) will lose his job.

I have no interest in any deals in which anyone would like me to participate. I truly do not have a strong opinion about any market right now, other than to say that things will continue to get worse for some time, probably years. I am content sitting on the sidelines and waiting. After all, sitting and waiting is how we made money from the subprime debacle. I now have time to repair my health, which was destroyed by the stress I layered onto myself over the past two years, as well as my entire life – where I had to compete for spaces in universities and graduate schools, jobs and assets under management – with those who had all the advantages (rich parents) that I did not. May meritocracy be part of a new form of government, which needs to be established.

On the issue of the U.S. Government, I would like to make a modest proposal. First, I point out the obvious flaws, whereby legislation was repeatedly brought forth to Congress over the past eight years, which would have reigned in the predatory lending practices of now mostly defunct institutions. These institutions regularly filled the coffers of both parties in return for voting down all of this legislation designed to protect the common citizen. This is an outrage, yet no one seems to know or care about it. Since Thomas Jefferson and Adam Smith passed, I would argue that there has been a dearth of worthy philosophers in this country, at least ones focused on improving government. Capitalism worked for two hundred years, but times change, and systems become corrupt. George Soros, a man of staggering wealth, has stated that he would like to be remembered as a philosopher. My suggestion is that this great man start and sponsor a forum for great minds to come together to create a new system of government that truly represents the common man’s interest, while at the same time creating rewards great enough to attract the best and brightest minds to serve in government roles without having to rely on corruption to further their interests or lifestyles. This forum could be similar to the one used to create the operating system, Linux, which competes with Microsoft’s near monopoly. I believe there is an answer, but for now the system is clearly broken.

Lastly, while I still have an audience, I would like to bring attention to an alternative food and energy source. You won’t see it included in BP’s, “Feel good. We are working on sustainable solutions,” television commercials, nor is it mentioned in ADM’s similar commercials. But hemp has been used for at least 5,000 years for cloth and food, as well as just about everything that is produced from petroleum products. Hemp is not marijuana and vice versa. Hemp is the male plant and it grows like a weed, hence the slang term. The original American flag was made of hemp fiber and our Constitution was printed on paper made of hemp. It was used as recently as World War II by the U.S. Government, and then promptly made illegal after the war was won. At a time when rhetoric is flying about becoming more self-sufficient in terms of energy, why is it illegal to grow this plant in this country? Ah, the female. The evil female plant – marijuana. It gets you high, it makes you laugh, it does not produce a hangover. Unlike alcohol, it does not result in bar fights or wife beating. So, why is this innocuous plant illegal? Is it a gateway drug? No, that would be alcohol, which is so heavily advertised in this country. My only conclusion as to why it is illegal, is that Corporate America, which owns Congress, would rather sell you Paxil, Zoloft, Xanax and other additive drugs, than allow you to grow a plant in your home without some of the profits going into their coffers. This policy is ludicrous. It has surely contributed to our dependency on foreign energy sources. Our policies have other countries literally laughing at our stupidity, most notably Canada, as well as several European nations (both Eastern and Western). You would not know this by paying attention to U.S. media sources though, as they tend not to elaborate on who is laughing at the United States this week. Please people, let’s stop the rhetoric and start thinking about how we can truly become self-sufficient.

With that I say good-bye and good luck.
All the best,
Andrew Lahde




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13 Responses to “Hedge Fund Manager Andrew Lahde Hates Hedge Fund Industry, Quitting Immediately”

  1. William Says:

    This guy sounds like a total schmuck. If he and his “low hanging fruit” are typical of Wall street, then all you guys over in America truly deserve to be sucking wind like your markets are now!

  2. S Says:

    I agree. Total schmuck.

    It’s easy to walk away when you are worth millions. F*** him. I hope he has fun smoking pot all day.

    He’ll be back though. A leopard can’t change his spots.

  3. from Canada Says:

    sure, he’s “typical” of Wall Street, and you both are supremely qualified to make such remarks…

  4. Rachael Says:

    This guy really tells it like it is. I totally agree. I have spent the last 10 years taking peoples money who thought they really were the smartest guys in the room…until I lost the stomach for it in July. They were rich and mean, and incredibly stupid with their money. Sounds like William and ‘S’ from above were the “low hanging fruit” we took advantage of. Sorry guys, better luck next time.

  5. Hedge fund manager gets out of the biz » Futures Trading Blog - Shadowtraders.com Says:

    [...] story here. Finally, someone who isn’t leaving because he lost all his clients’ money, killed [...]

  6. matisse Says:

    Finally, someone who is telling it like it is. It is true-hemp and cannabis, legalized, would transform our nation into a new era of productivity, health, and innovation. Congratulations to Andrew Lahde, a real man.

  7. n999 Says:

    got made respect for someone who leaves the game at the top. Especially during the times when everyone was getting cleaned out. Gosh knows i have been getting cleaned out. Those who think this guy is a schmuck might want to look themselves in the mirror.

    unrelated but barry sanders left at the top of his game and probably added years to his life because of lower stress and physical beating… we didn’t like it but he did it.

    people who can be candid, should be respected like this guy. he made many money and was compensated for it during a difficult year. that is respectful, haters - call it a fluke or not. he did a great job and served many clients in a honorable way for their needs. now he is out and living a better life because of it. that is what we all strive for right? don’t hate the player, hate the game because that player was good at that game.

    grow up haters and for the first time in your lives, the school of hard knocks is in full effect. I have been living on that yard for decades and it pleases me to see others on the yard that have no idea what it is really like. welcome to my house, you are welcome but be respectful!

  8. sb29 Says:

    Hats off to Andrew. You are so right when you say they all will be forgotten in 50 years. You ar also right in asking Sorros to set up a fund to honestly debate and create protection for the common man. This is what I admire most in Americans. Straight talk and energy to carry through. However so wrongly applied by Bush, tarnishing american image for a long time.

  9. Lewis Says:

    it will take years to create protection for common man by sorros himself. why he want to do that? or just to be remembered as philosopher? some people profited so much from the system and now is starting to think about pay back, social responsibility? when someone hit home run, he will keep doing it until the system fails, not to mentioned the system already have flaw, he just took advantage of the system and no one figures it. buying gold is the best way because you dont even want to think about it. legalized marijuana, legalized hemp,,,etc,,,,, Guys, If I made 7-8 figures out of this game,,,, I will tell you a lot of nonsense,,, and hope that I will be remember as a philosopher,,, for sure I will quit at the top,,,, why not we just sit back and wait. Well, Maybe banks with 100 percent guarantee on your money in case of bankruptcy, and high interest rates can be good alternative.

  10. Joe Says:

    William and S - suck it up. someone like Andrew seems to have done the better than the likes of you. The man is clearly smart and to many of us it appears you are jealous and are indeed the schmucks. Good for Andrew !! Enjoy your time.

  11. bevin Says:

    Andrew please come down to Zimbabwe Stock Exchange where noise trading eventually translates into fundamentals.

  12. keith Says:

    This guy is absolutely right but he still lacks any integrity. It is easy to say the things he says when one has sufficiently socked away millions and never has to work again. I’m glad he is “content” with his money.

    I’d have more respect for his wisdom if he didn’t take advantage of the greed himself and then blame everyone around him for the correpution that is slowly eating away this country.

    What a douche. Take your money and run asshole.

  13. joe Says:

    William, I think your blackberry is ringing, better go grab it, schmuck

    hahahahahaha

    suckers

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